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Social Distancing - by Frank Bartscheck II


Copyright (c) 2020

frankebii@aucegypt.edu

INT. DAY - A DIMLY LIT STUDIO

APARTMENT

MARIAM, a diminutive and slightly

built 30-something female, who

passes for 20-something, stands

toward the back of the stage in

front of a dresser with a larger

mirror. Her back is to the audience,

but her face is reflected in the

mirror so the audience can see her.

She inspects a mobile phone. The

light from the phone's display

illuminates her face. She reads a

message from her phone out-loud in a

soliloquy.

MARIAM

Nour, looking back it is obvious. But while I felt I was

living in the moment, it never occurred to me. (BEAT) How

could it? I never stopped to think, ruminate or ponder. I

just kept going...moving to my next fascination...and they

always came quickly, like flipping channels on a television.

MARIAM looks away from the phone,

but not directly into the mirror

MARIAM

Ughhhh-Oh my god, what've I done!?

MARIAM sighs, looks up at herself in

the mirror and cringes. Her

attention returns to the phone. She

continues reading out-loud.

MARIAM

Fucking hell, how we'd get here? I know I shouldn't have said

anything to you last week. (BEAT) It seems like yesterday I

was hopeful, everything before me made sense and I was

tenacious (BEAT) Now I drown in anxiety. (BEAT) This

goddamned isolation, which I so craved has metastasized into

a burdensome presence that won't allow me to ignore myself

any longer. (BEAT) I miss you. (BEAT) I took you for granted

because I loved your company when I needed it. (BEAT) I know

I was wrong, but I need you more than ever.

MARIAM looks at herself in the

mirror and speaks directly to

herself.

MARIAM

Oh MY GAWD'MARIAM! What did'you do? And why isn't Nour

writing back? Its been at least five minutes (BEAT) and seems

like forever.

MARIAM looks away from the mirror

and walks over to an end table in

the darkened corner of the

apartment. She puts down the phone,

plugs it into a charger and

continues to speak aloud.

MARIAM

Mariam, you gotta stop re-reading the message (BEAT) and

torturing yourself. (BEAT) Don't worry, our li'light will hit

us back...

MARIAM lays on a couch and picks up

the television remote. She snaps on

the TV.

MARIAM

(dejected)

...or they won't.

MARIAM stares at the television

screen while continuously flipping

through channels. A few moments

pass.

The mobile phone dings and

illuminates the darkened corner of

the room. MARIAM sits up and inhales

excitedly. In one motion, she mutes

the television and sets down the

remote. The channel remains on NILE

TV. Two individuals on a "talk show"

continuously talk over and, at

times, become animated while yelling

at each other.

MARIAM

(joyful exuberance)

Nour!

MARIAM races to the other side of

the room. The warm glow from the

phone once again illuminates

MARIAM's face as she inspects the

message.

MARIAM

(dejected)

Dammit, just Majd. Why hasn't my light written back? Its been

like a hour!

A moment passes as MARIAM inspect

Majd's message more closely, then

laughs hysterically. MARIAM directly

addresses the audience and holds the

phone up. She speaks directly to the

audience while interrupting herself

with momentary fits of laughter.

MARIAM

I really wish you could see this...it's like the funniest

damn thing I have ever seen...memes can be such an effective

cure for boredom (BEAT) and can cut right to the heart of an

issue.

MARIAM pulls the phone down to

inspect the contents.

MARIAM

Here, I'll describe it.

MARIAM begins speaking, at times

laughter interrupts her soliloquy.

MARIAM

It's a photo of someone non-descriptively waving hello or

goodbye to a bunch of friends at a party (BEAT) maybe a

Shabka. Everyone is obviously delighted by the main

character's presence. A thought bubble above the main

character's says, "I'm not going, but I still want to be

invited!"

MARIAM's laughter trails off as she

becomes somber.

MARIAM

These things (shaking the phone). Reinforcing machines of

indoctrination (BEAT) we never saw it coming (BEAT) a freight

train of ritualistic patterning that flattened society long

ago (BEAT) the cultural habituation of zombie-like behavior

that I now loath with every fiber of my being (BEAT) Yet, it

triggers fits of laughter, overwhelming emotions of joy

(VOICE RISING) and somehow makes me feel connected to someone

who is not even here EVERY GODDAMNED TIME IT DINGS!

MARIAM feigns slamming down the

phone.

MARIAM

FUCK YOU!

In a fit or rage MARIAM throws the

phone against the wall. MARIAM

briefly stands motionless, then

rushes over and falls to her knees

to inspect the broken phone.

MARIAM

(Wailing)

OHHHHHH No-N-NAH-N-NOOOOOOO!

MARIAM holds the phone up and

continuously tries to power it on to

no avail.

MARIAM

Fucking fuck, what the fuck is wrong with you! Yo'fucking

idiot! MOM WAS RIGHT! You're useless! (BEAT) A FUCKING MORON!

A loud knock from the other side of

the wall cuts off MARIAM's rant. She

looks up in shock.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(a voice emanates

from the other side

of the wall)

Hey! The hell is going on over there!?

Stunned by the unexpected intrusion,

MARIAM sits silently.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Hey, I'm talking to you! What's up basha? We're all adjusting

to this new normal!

MARIAM

Sorry mam. I (BEAT) I just, I just broke my phone, which is

my only connection to the outside world (BEAT) and a constant

reminder of how adept I've been at avoidance my entire life

(BEAT) and Nour hasn't written me and its been like four

hours since I messaged....

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(quizzically)

So you're avoiding Nour?

MARIAM

No, that's not what (BEAT) its just, I'm sorry. (BEAT) I lost

my cool (BEAT) my phone reminded me how adept I've been at

avoiding myself.

NEIGHBOR (V.O)

(a bit annoyed)

Whatever. (BEAT) We're all adjusting to this isolat...

MARIAM waves her broken phone around

in vain.

MARIAM

(interrupting)

This goddamned thing has constantly interrupted my entire

life with the next thrilling interpolation. (BEAT)

Procrastination. Check. (BEAT) Excuse making. Check. (BEAT)

Never following through. Check.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

...a constant interruption?

MARIAM

EXACTLY!

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(sarcastically)

No idea what you mean...

MARIAM

That reminds me of this time in college.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(sarcastically)

I guess I'm all ears.

MARIAM

A buddy of mine (BEAT) his nickname was Darsh (BEAT) produced

this somewhat viral meme.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

What viral meme?

MARIAM

It's a photo of a professor with overlaid text saying:

Interrupts his own lecture when someone quietly gets up to

leave for the restroom. To call them out on interrupting his

lecture.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(chuckling)

That's pretty damn funny...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

...it was inspired by real events, it actually happened to

us....

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Us?

MARIAM

Darsh and me.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

I had a friend named Mostafa.

MARIAM

Wait, seriously?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Come'on, it's a pretty common name you kno...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

I wish we met sooner....

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

...don't be still (BEAT) we did.

MARIAM

I thought you'were, I mean, how long have you lived here?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Here? (BEAT) three years or so I guess.

MARIAM

(incredulous)

THREE YEARS! Are yo'serious? (BEAT) That's right around when

I moved...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

In...? (BEAT) Yea, I know (BEAT) we crossed paths from time

to time (BEAT) but you never noticed...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

wait...and we'never met?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Nah, you always seemed intent on other things (BEAT) so I

left you alone.

MARIAM

(under her breath)

Sounds about right.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

What?

MARIAM

Nothing.

As the conversation dies off, MARIAM

walks over and opens a dresser

drawer. She frantically searches for

something.

MARIAM

You don't happen to have an old mobile phone?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

To replace the one you just...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

Never mind!

MARIAM excitedly pulls out an old

mobile phone from the drawer. She

scrambles over and grabs the broken

phone from the floor. She

frantically pulls out the sim card

and puts into her old phone. She

tries to power on the old phone.

MARIAM

Goddammit! Battery's dead!

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Huh?

MARIAM

Nothing, sorry (BEAT) I found an old phone but the battery's

dead. Gotta charge it (BEAT) but I'm expecting an important

message.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(uninterested)

Oh ok.

MARIAM

Yea, Nour, my best friend for like ever (BEAT) I fucked up

(BEAT) I've been waiting for what seems like forever...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Oh nice! (BEAT) My best friends and I are having an online

party tonight, we're gettin'dolled up...

MARIAM

(dejected)

Oh.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

You can join us if you want...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

Thanks (BEAT) but...I was too forward.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

What'da'ya mean? (BEAT) You weren't forward, I invited you...

MARIAM

(a bit confused)

Oh yea, thanks anyway...

MARIAM looks in the direction of the

charging phone.

MARIAM

(frustrated)

Come on Nour!

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(piqued interest)

Were you together?

MARIAM

Wait (BEAT) what'am I doing?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(quizzically)

I thought you'were charging your phone.

MARIAM

No, I mean, I'm sharing more of myself with you, someone I

actively avoided (BEAT) and I'm opening up to you more than

anyone else (BEAT) like ever.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(uninterested again)

(yawning) guess so...

MARIAM turns to address the audience

and motions to the wall while

speaking.

MARIAM

And I don't even know their name?!

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

What? I didn't get that?

MARIAM

Nothing, I'm just saying I don't even know your name and I

avoided you before this enforced isolation (BEAT) now I am

pouring my heart out (BEAT) to a wall...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(flippant)

seems so.

MARIAM

(interrupting)

I thought I used to love isolation (BEAT) until I was

forced...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Yup.

MARIAM

(fascinated)

Weird huh?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(disinterested)

I'guess.

MARIAM

So what is...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

OH (BEAT) MY (BEAT) GAWD!

MARIAM

What?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

I fucking LOVE this dress!

MARIAM

Ugh. (BEAT) Seriously? (BEAT) I loath girly shit most of the

time, such an imposition (BEAT) a burden...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

...if you could see this dress, you wouldn't think it an

imposition (BEAT) It (BEAT) is (BEAT) gorgie...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

What's your name?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

You ain't gonna believe it (BEAT) Maryam.

MARIAM

Believe what? Wait how'd you know my...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

My name is Maryam.

MARIAM

No shit! (BEAT) Wait (BEAT) You're messing with me?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(sarcastic)

Messing with you? (BEAT) You're the one talking to a wall.

MARIAM

(laughing)

Guess ya got me there (BEAT) Ms. Magnuuna.

MARIAM's old phone powers to life.

The screen re-illuminates the

darkened corner of the room. Almost

immediately, multiple dings are

audibly heard, which instantly

interpolates MARIAM.

MARIAM inhales excitedly.

MARIAM

Oh my god, I knew Nour'd write!

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Nour?

MARIAM intensely stares at the phone

as she inspects the new messages.

Distracted, MARIAM incorrectly

interrupts the neighbor's response.

Her zombie-like reply reveals how

rapt her attention is on her phone.

MARIAM

(half-heartedly)

Wait. Yer name's Nour?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(annoyed)

No man!

MARIAM

FUCK! What the fuck!

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

WHAT?

MARIAM

Shit, sorry. Nour...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting/

annoyed)

I just told you my name IS NOT NOUR, IT'S MARYAM.

MARIAM

(struggling to

explain)

No (BEAT) I know (BEAT) What I mean (BEAT) Shit, sorry. It's

just a message from Malak.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(quizzically annoyed)

And now who th'hell is Malak.

MARIAM

Apparently no one important.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(confused)

Guess not.

MARIAM

Actually Malak is...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting

excitedly)

OH OH OH! Should I go wi'the Temraza or th'Kojak?

MARIAM

(puzzled)

Do'you mean Cujo, like in Stephen King the auth...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

OH (BEAT) MY (BEAT) GAWD NO! (BEAT) I said Kojak or Temraza,

which should I wear for the party?

MARIAM addresses the audience

directly.

MARIAM

What the fuck is a Temraza?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

What?

MARIAM

Definitely the Temraza (BEAT) obviously.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Thought so, I think it's...

MARIAM

Gorgie?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

SO TOTALLY!

MARIAM

Well that's taken care of...(BEAT) I just wish....

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Your light would text back, yeah I know.

MARIAM

Sorry, I keep repeating myself, it's just...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Don't sweat it, we all do.

MARIAM

(under her breath)

I guess so.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Gotta speak up! I can't hear you, it's just me, myself and I

over here!

MARIAM

Temraza, definitely.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

You know in high school, my friends called me 'Maryam Achen'

cause I talked to myself a lot.

MARIAM

That is hilarious...were they good conversations...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Dammit, the food is cold!

MARIAM

(confused)

What? (BEAT) Food...?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

IS COLD! Yea, gabbing about nothing and I forgot about the

food (BEAT) SHIT!

MARIAM

(still confused)

Sorry.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(annoyed)

Whatever. (BEAT) It's gross, but I'll just throw it on the

burner and re-heat it.

MARIAM

That reminds me, when I was like 13 or something, I pretty

much burned down the family flat.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Pretty much? What, with a stove?

MARIAM

Not really. (BEAT) My mom found my diary and read it (BEAT)

at the time, it felt like such an invasion of privacy.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(incredulous)

So you retaliated by burning down the flat?!

MARIAM

(chuckling)

Jesus, NO! (BEAT) but maybe I should have.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(under her breath)

Weirdo.

MARIAM

Huh?

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Nothing (BEAT) Keep going...how'd you...

As she continues the conversation,

MARIAM takes a seat on the couch,

pulls the coffee table closer to

her. She leans over and begins

rolling a cigarette.

MARIAM

(interrupting)

...burn down the flat? (BEAT) Well, I tore out the pages from

my journal, which felt like personal memories that had been

stolen from me (BEAT) and I neatly folded them into paper

airplanes...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

...and loaded them full of fuel and dived bombed the flat

like a kamikaze?

MARIAM

(chuckling)

Not a bad thought, but no. (BEAT) I had this grand idea

(BEAT) I lit a candle.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

...and you threw the paper airplanes at the candle!?

MARIAM

(shocked)

Yea (BEAT) How'd you...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Oh shit! Seriously?! (BEAT) Wait, what'd you think? Smokey

eye or just a pop of color?

MARIAM

Not my finest moment.

MARIAM lights the cigarette and

takes a long drag.

MARIAM

(exhaling smoke)

Smokey eyes sounds delicious.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

So then what happened?

MARIAM

Oh yea, so, I finally hit the mark after trying for about 30

minutes or so (BEAT) and bingo (BEAT) the plane full of

stolen memories ignited...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

Oh shit! Then...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

...the fiery paper airplane maintained its aerodynamic

capability and floated (BEAT) that is until it landed on the

curtains, which went up surprisingly fast.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Holy shit! And then the flat! Was anyone hurt?

MARIAM

Not necessarily from the fire (BEAT) My mom whipped my ass. I

mean, she hit me before, but never quite like that.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Well, you did burn the flat down....

MARIAM

Yea, not exactly. (BEAT) It caused some damage to the room,

but the story always sounds more intriguing if I say I...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

...burned down the flat...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

...the extensive damage was to our relationship (BEAT) I

moved out less then a year later, which was like three years

ago...

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

(interrupting)

You were soooo right about smokey eyes...

MARIAM

(interrupting)

...she only came to visit once in three years (BEAT) we never

really spoke...

MARIAM takes another long drag from

her hand-rolled cigarette.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

delicious!

A sharp knock at the door interrupts

jolts MARIAM. She walks over, opens

the door and audibly gasps.

MARIAM

MOM! What the hell're you doing here?

MOM

We need to talk.

NEIGHBOR (V.O.)

Like OH MY GAWD! (BEAT) Is that really Mom? (BEAT) The girls

are gonna have a fit...

Mariam turns toward the voice.

MARIAM

(loudly interrupting)

SHUT UP!

MOM

(confused)

I didn't say anything?

MARIAM

The stupid fucking neighbor won't shut up.

MOM

(visibly disturbed)

You have a neighbor?

FADE OUT:

THE END.

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